Of Dying, Marriage and Religion (by a four-year-old)

Little T and her father like to invent stories, they do this after her Dad has read her a bed-time story.  They create their very own, which usually includes herself and her close friends at school, sometimes it’s also about her favourite toys.

It’s sweet to hear them do their make-up stories as I go about doing my chores, mostly it’s trying to clear-away the mess in the living room.  The only problem is little T likes to end her turn with “And then they died … ” And according to my husband, she says this with her big-brown eyes, a serious expression on her face, leans forward and then declares “Your turn Dad!”

Then the husband has to rack his brains out to think of ways not to end the story with the characters dying.  For example:

T:  “Then F, M and R fell into a dark hole and then they died …. Your turn Dad!”

Husband: “But unknown to them, that dark hole was a magic hole!  They landed on their bums and had a good laugh about it” 

What’s this obsession with dying?  I blame Finding Nemo, no wait.  I blame Frozen.  Little T likes to mention that Elsa’s parents sailed away and ended up drowning and dying.  “I don’t want you to die Mummy” She says worriedly to me.  While I’m tempted to assure her that I’m not going to die, I tell her instead that I’m not going to die anytime soon (silently add, I hope).  Instead I say “When mummy does, I’ll be a very old woman and you’ll be a grown-up with a great career, your own home and family”.

That usually does the trick, because my four-year-old also likes to talk about marriage.


“I want to marry F, mummy!”  For those who have been reading my blog for some time now, you’ll be familiar with F, who happens to be my daughter’s best friend since age two.  She has many friends now, but F will always be her best friend and the boy she wants to marry.

I say to her, “You’re only four T, I’m sure you’ll change your mind”

“No mummy.  I won’t ever, ever, ever, change my mind!”

The next day, she changes her mind and wants to marry N.  What about F, I ask.  “Oh M wants to marry F, so I’m going to marry N now”.



Little T and I are Catholics.  But somehow it was understood that our daughter would be a Catholic too.  He doesn’t mind at all.

Every night we say our prayers.  I taught her how to pray “Angel of God” but also taught her a short prayer when she’s really tired.  Of course now, she always opts for the shorter version.

“Is God more powerful than Father Christmas?”


“Why is God more powerful than Father Christmas?”

“Well because God made Father Christmas!”

“Does that mean, all my present are from God then?”

At the age four, she’s got everything sorted-out already.

Do you have funny conversations with your little ones?


  1. Zena's Suitcase

    The world is so black and white when your 4 isn’t it. I can’t wait to here my daughters musings in a year or too #sharewithme

    • True and much less complicated. We ought to tale our cue from them 😉

  2. Erin @ Nourishing My Scholar

    My 2 year old has entered a “die” stage…If she sees an image of a family in a book and then the next page the image is just the children, she’ll say, “Where’s the daddy…he die…” I’m at a loss of where this is coming from…Thank you for sharing your experience 🙂

    • I guess it’s because they see and hear about it everywhere, books, tv, films… so it’s not surprising that they also like to mention it too.

  3. Kate @ Did That Just Happen?

    Oh, what great conversations! I love her ending the stories! The “die” stage can get creepy, kudos to dad for turning it around in such a fun way!

    One of my favorites, Mr. T was spending the week with a family friend, his old babysitter – they were so close, and after I started working from home and didn’t need after school care, well, they decided that every spring break, and two weeks of every summer, and time at Christmas – I pretty much had joint custody with her for several years! LOL – that’s not the point!

    Anyway, I never get sick until he is away for a few days… it’s like my body knows that he is gone and can break down! 🙂 That’s not the point either….

    Anyway, he was gone and called to say Hi, and I told him I was sick and he said that he should come home so he could kidding me. And I said “you are kidding me?” and he goes “Yeah, when I’m sick you are always mommying me, so, since I’m a kid, I’ll come kidding you”

    Seriously, I almost hauled my sick butt in the car to go get him after that! 🙂

    • Thanks for sharing! Your stories are always so funny and touching. Love what he said about “kidding” you 🙂 It’s so obvious that you and Mr. T have such a lovely and close relationship. I hope T and I will continue to have that too 🙂 x

      • Kate @ Did That Just Happen?

        I know you guys will! You and your hubby seem to have such a good balance of time spent with her and time letting her learn and explore – I’ve loved getting to know y’all through your blog!

        • I hope so too. Yes, I think we are equally close to her and have the same bond. I do love it too. Maybe because my hubby mostly works at home and only goes away about one day in a week to do lectures. Most times, he’s at home and is very hands on with T. Love getting to you and Mr T too 🙂

  4. Jenny Evans

    She sounds so much like my daughter. So glad you’re writing these things down, because you think you’ll never forget, but…

    It’s a little disturbing when kids go through a phase where every story is about dying. I mean, I think it’s totally normal and they’re just copying what they see in movies, but it SOUNDS disturbing when a preschooler is talking about death, death, death!


    • Actually I’m really bad at putting things down in writing. I really should, you should too 🙂 Yes, I find it disturbing too, that’s why we try to keep it light and try to distract her from talking too much about it.

  5. You asked why T is slightly obsessed with death? I think that’s a phase. I remember your younger brother U, my fave, used to ask me why people die. It was a series of “why” questions after every answer I’ve given him. He was only 2 then.

    • Maybe obsessed is the wrong word to use. Definitely a phase and no, she’s not like U, she doesn’t ask as much “whys” as he used to when he was a kid.

  6. Katy (What Katy Said)

    This made me laugh as my little girl likes to tell strangers that she has eggs in her tummy that are called Rosie and Thomas- and that when she is old enough they are going to pop out!! I get some very strange looks!!!

    • That is hilarious! T also knows about eggs in mummy’s um when asked how she was made. But thankfully she doesn’t go around calling them names …. yet! Kids are so funny, aren’t they?

  7. Jenny @ Let's Talk Mommy

    I truly think all kids have a stage where they are obsessed with dying or death or the mere fact of talking about it in public. Embarrassing. But seems like all 14 of my nieces and nephews have been there and so I am waiting until it starts with my two as well. It’s just curiosity of the unknown isn’t it. But disney films are great for someone’s parents dying which then we wonder why our kids get obsessed with it. I can’t watch lion king or bambi without wanting to cry. Kids are funny aren’t they? She sounds so creative though and love that they make up stories together. Cute. Thank you ever so much for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme

    • Speaking of Bambi, my mother-in-law once said to me that my husband cried when he first watched Bambi as a child. T didn’t, but she said it makes her sad 🙁

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